With the speed "Safety" cameras being out and about at strategic points across Thanet this month; just past King Ethelbert's school being a favourite, here's a list of the top ten speed camera excuses to share with you:
1) I had passed out after seeing flashing lights, which I believed to be UFOs in the distance. The flash of the camera brought me round from my trance.
2) I was in the airport’s flight path and I believe the camera was triggered by a jet overhead, not my car.
3) I had a severe bout of diarrhoea and had to speed to a public toilet.
4) There was a strong wind behind my car which pushed me over the limit.
5) My friend had just chopped his fingers off and I was rushing the fingers to hospital.
6) The vibrations from the surfboard I had on the roof rack set off the camera.
7) I had to rush my dying hamster to the vets.
8) A violent sneeze caused a chain reaction where my foot pushed down harder on the accelerator.
9) There was a suspected case of foot and mouth and I had to rush to see the cow concerned.
10) The only way I could demonstrate my faulty clutch was to accelerate madly.
If you know of any better excuses, do let me know!