Having looked through all the Sunday papers this morning I have decided to retreat into a darkened room and not re-appear again until my beard touches the floor.
Seriously though, the news is depressing at he best of times but with earthquakes in Folkestone, a family threatened with eviction after they put up razor wire to stop vandals breaking into their property and a suggestion that Gordon Brown plans to tax our gardens when he is made PM - probably next week - Australia is looking increasingly attractive as a potential retirement destination. We can forget Spain for the moment, as there's more gloom and doom over the predicted Spanish property price collapse and some 15,000 UK citizens threatened with having their homes bulldozed because they don't have the right kind of planning permission, granted by "dodgy" Spanish local councils.
We can all take heart with the news that supermodel, Kate Moss, is reportedly worth £45 million as one of Britain's wealthiest and that Cherie Blair, who once preferred her maiden name of "Ms Cherie Booth", now has a new website, which re-positions her neatly as a "Mrs Blair" again, just in time to take advantage of the lucrative American lecture circuit when Tony steps down. That reminds me, it was in the States that I once met Harold Wilson, pipe and all, when he gave a lecture at my university there.
There's a great deal of open political water between Harold and Tony but history has shown that the United States can be very kind to retired British Prime Ministers.
I will leave you with one story, which isn't really a revelation, as government have known about it for ages and it represents a significant objection to the introduction of ID cards.
"Millions of national insurance numbers have been "lost", the Government has admitted, raising fears that they are being misused by fraudsters and illegal immigrants.
"Adesola Adelana, Stephen Ayankoya and Adetutu Olowe stole 37 numbers in total and used them to help open 11 bank accounts, obtain eight forged driving licences and access nine credit cards. They were sentenced to between 30 months and four years"
The nine million numbers were issued by the Department for Work and Pensions (DWP) and are registered on its database, but officials do not know if they are held legitimately."
Herein lies the problem. The government either through gross error or through the corrupt action of a small number of civil servants, has issued not 10,000 - as in passports or even driving licenses - but "9 million" false NI numbers. It's such an enormous figure that it's hard to countenance and it presents an awful dilemma in that that revealing in any part, who the nine million fraudsters are, would bring the system to collapse in attempting to prosecute and deal with the related fraud and entitlement issues.
The result, is that you and I, through our taxes are subsidising up to nine million "ghosts" to the tune of at least £20 billion each year, (£330 for every person in the country according to reorted figures).
Anybody else fancy a new life in Australia then?